{"product_id":"jester-skull-hooded-blanket-sarcasm-culture-gothic-cozy-throw","title":"The \"Just One Glass\" Hooded Blanket — Jester Queen | Sarcasm Culture","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eThe Jester speaks:\u003c\/em\u003e \"Just one glass,\" she said. And technically, she wasn't lying. The Jester Queen has claimed her throne — a recliner, obviously — and that glass? It holds exactly one bottle. Perfectly measured. Completely reasonable. No notes.\"\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThis hooded blanket is her royal decree of comfort. Wrap yourself in bold Jester Skull art splashed in rich purples, greens, and black while you settle in for a night of absolutely nothing productive. The oversized kangaroo pocket holds your remote, your snacks, and your dignity — two out of three ain't bad. Lightweight fleece keeps you warm without the effort of, say, getting up.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eFor the woman who does everything — and has earned the right to do absolutely nothing.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eLightweight 100% polyester fleece — warm but not heavy\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eLarge kangaroo front pocket for hands, remotes, and snacks\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eVibrant no-fade full-color Jester Queen print\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eMedium-weight fabric (5.3 oz\/yd² \/ 180 g\/m²) for everyday wear\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSewn-in label for lasting care instructions\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e Machine wash cold (max 30°C\/90°F) — hand wash extends quality. No iron, no tumble dry, no bleach.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"One size \/ Black","offer_id":53599560040721,"sku":"25738780108299941434","price":60.68,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0970\/6261\/7361\/files\/11929243034521801930_2048.jpg?v=1779846390","url":"https:\/\/shopsarcasmculture.com\/products\/jester-skull-hooded-blanket-sarcasm-culture-gothic-cozy-throw","provider":"Sarcasm Culture","version":"1.0","type":"link"}